🔗 Share this article

“Well, it’s rather brutal here. The guidance we offer all of our clients to put everything they’ve got into tinned provisions and hunting rifles.” This piece of wise counsel comes from the Brain Gremlin – a lab-engineered, speaking, glasses-wearing member of the slimy Gremlin horde that infests Manhattan’s ultra-modern Clamp Tower skyscraper in helmer Joe Dante’s madcap sequel Gremlins 2: The New Batch. Superficially, it’s nothing more than an investment tip from one monster to another. But, in a strange manner, it’s also remarkably sound life advice. Honestly, hear me out.

When situations deteriorate, the biggest mistake you can do is approach matters with excessive gravity. The Brain Gremlin understands this. Actually, a large portion of the fang-bearing creatures that inhabit Dante’s wild 1990 film (possibly his finest) possess the same wry, meta sense of humour regarding the indistinct border separating daily routine and pure pandemonium. It’s one element of Gremlins 2: The New Batch that keeps me coming back – and with the passage of time, it’s the theme that echoes the loudest.

An Early Life Obsession

Understandably, my fondness for this movie wasn’t born on such an philosophical plane. As a child, we possessed merely a few battered VHS tapes at home. Part of that group were Gremlins and its sequel, the latter housed in a chunky ex-rental box likely purchased from an off-brand video shop and featuring snarling creatures on its knackered cover. I was right away smitten and these films wasted no time embedding themselves inside my tiny, impressionable mind. After that point, they became an almost-daily part of my early years entertainment regimen.

Dante’s first film usually receives all the accolades, thanks mostly because of its legacy as a semi-scary seasonal fave – and let me be clear, I’ve watched Gremlins an incalculable number of times. That said, its sequel seldom receives the same level of high regard, which feels criminal. As a kid, I’d always seize the chance to watch Gremlins 2. During sunny school summer breaks, I’d seclude myself indoors and play it. When I acquired my personal TV-VHS combo unit, it stayed in constant rotation in my bedroom. Gradually, it ingrained itself in my mental framework. If my parents detected this preoccupation, they gave no indication of concern.

Deeper Discoveries and Societal Easter Eggs

As I got older, new understandings enhanced repeat viewings, amplifying the pleasure of watching diminutive verdant beasts joyously wreck a New York high-rise. I learned the future-focused property magnate and Clamp Tower owner, Daniel Clamp (John Glover), was inspired directly by future president Donald Trump, with his auburn-haired worker Marla (Haviland Morris) echoing his one-time partner Marla Maples. Luckily, Clamp possesses greater compassion than his genuine article inspiration.

The “end of civilisation” video Clamp plays during peak-Gremlin chaos? I discovered it was inspired by a actual “Doomsday” video commissioned by the CNN boss Ted Turner should the world truly faced apocalypse. I noticed how Dante made a special effort to film alternate cuts of a self-aware scene where Gremlins seize control of the very film you’re watching. One for cinemas, one for VHS and TV, each providing a grinning portion of fourth-wall-breaking cultural alchemy prior to the concept being mainstream.

A Persistent Appeal

While it was makeup maestro Rick Baker’s gloriously nasty-looking creatures that drew my gaze as a child, this subsurface richness held my interest as an adult. Eventually, I even interviewed Dante about it myself and he had no hesitation telling me he made the movie with the specific aim of ridiculing those who loved its absurd-yet-genuine predecessor and desired a sequel. “We were going to make fun of the fact you came to see it,” he gleefully confessed. This Looney Tunes-esque defiance and determination to not take his sequel as gravely as his Warner Bros bosses clearly wanted him to, only deepened my appreciation further.

When I went through a unexpected loss in the family recently, I was astonished to realize that, during my deepest grief, all I felt compelled to do was sit and watch Gremlins 2: The New Batch. Weird, right? Maybe not. The comforting familiarity it offered was necessary to dilute my mind’s mourning mire – but the perspectives it had bestowed upon me as an adult were similarly beneficial.

Like Gremlins running amok in a genetics laboratory, there’s some things in life you just are powerless over. Dante knows it. The Brain Gremlin knows it too. Sometimes, you have to emulate them: embrace the chaos, commit your entire being into tinned provisions and hunting rifles and try not to view the world with undue solemnity.

It’s powerful existential guidance from a most improbable origin – and it’s the reason Gremlins 2: The New Batch will forever remain my comfort movie.